Never Ending

Everything Has It's Purpose

2008-05-06T17:46:00.000-07:00

I believe everything happens for a definite purpose. I might say I grew up in
an unideal family. My parents are separated almost 5 yrs ago, currently
having their own lives apart. Well I manage to get in touch with both of them,
anyway, they're still my parents and no one can ever change that.

It was just last year when my dad introduced a girl to us. It was quite
surprising finding out that she's five years younger than me! I'm
even uncertain how I should call her. It was a bit awkward finding out the he
already replaced my mom, but we never know they have their own reasons
why things happen. Maybe its better for them to be distant with each other rather
than being together without any love at all. I admit at times I do have grudge
against him, I may consider that he is not an ideal dad whenever I look way
back in my childhood. But people do change, sometimes it all happens after
experiencing difficulties and conflicts. He's now better than what he was before.
The grudge I felt before was replaced with love and understanding and it was
indeed a great relief.

Me and my siblings have our own lives now and what we are now?,
we owe it all to our parents. Even our lives wasn't that perfect, we all grew
up with respect, discipline, diligence and love. And I'm proud of how we became.
Having an imperfect family doesn't mean you're bound to live an entire
life imperfectly. It all depends on seeking the right decisions,
understanding circumstances, and wisdom granted from the One above.

2008-03-20T08:13:00.000-07:00

Its summer time. I can feel the heat of the sunshine. It's also the
best time to be with our family. Best to have bondings in different ways.
If you want to stay at home, being in the kitchen needs a lot of hand. After
those times being busy at work, remember we always are in a hurry to
pack things especially our food. Now is a great time to cook something
special. You'll have all the time in the world, no worries of getting late at work.
Having dinner prepared with hands full of love is never been better. Grab
your recipe and make one that will touches your families' buds.

An angel in a stranger..

2008-03-18T23:06:00.000-07:00

Few years ago, I met a guy online from UK. It only started wen
he accidentally sent me a message and mistakenly thought I was
the girl he used to talk to. He is a christian thats why I got interested
having conversations with him.

After years of being a cyber friend he became my spiritual adviser.
There are times I felt like no one would understand me especially
when I'm in the peak of being doomed as I may describe it.
He was the only one who lifted my spirit. Even if he's still a stranger,
I felt comfort and hope when exchanging chats with him. It was like
God sent an angel trapped in a stranger.

I could still remember when times I felt a bit awkward at him.
I felt pity for myself that my lifeis way too far from him that he
wouldn't want to imagine. Felt like he would never understand me
our lives were ends apart. But what i thought just flew with the wind.
I never felt ashamed telling him every inch of my stories, my laughters
and tears. We became good friends but I never imagine what or how will
it be if I'm personally in front of him. Maybe I'm too open because he
wouldn't have a chance to see me especially crying while tapping my
keyboards. Somehow talking to a stranger eases some of my pains.

Time came when our conversation dwindle. It took also about a year
that we havent heard from each other. And surprisingly lately a
message popped up my window. He's back again. I was very thankful
he always prays for me even on times that were not hearing from
each other. Some of my prayers back then were all granted. I believe he
had shared a big part from it. After moments of dwindled chats it came
back again and he still is my angel. No wonder my prayers were always
been granted because I know I wasnt the only one asking God but my
angel in a stranger...

2008-03-10T04:17:00.000-07:00

hmmm. makes sense..

My sister's wedding

2008-03-10T03:42:00.000-07:00

I remembered the day my sister tied her knot. Its a simple civil wedding.
They only invited few friends and relatives for a simple reception at a nearby
restaurant.

I was asked to host a short program at the reception. An impromptu one.
It was really too memorable with all the laughs and sensible sentiments being
heard. I did asked our eldest bro, her husbands eldest sister and both parents
to do their speech. Tears went all over the place especially the elders.. hehe.
Of course it will not end without the newly wed's moment on the floor.
Not to mention i even lend the tissue holder to them.. lols. And I also get one for
myself. It was fun and memorable. Felt like everyone went crazy wiping their tears
and laughing at the same time and its all because of me. he he.

The happiest moment of my sister and her husband no one could ever forget.
Waiting for the long table next year, not to mention a baby in her tummy also..
weeee...

Can't help but cry...

2008-03-09T11:05:00.000-07:00

Its not a good weekend for me. I had a talk with my mom and tell of
something really disappointing. I'm a person whose very open with everything I feel
especially to my love ones. Don't want them guessing whats on my mind.
I was so mad I wanted to shout yet still need to respect her. Feels like my heart wants
to explode and the earth's gravity was pulling my heart. When theres nothing you can
do about it, you just cry. Somehow it eases the pain. Of all people why on earth does it
have to be her? You want everything to be the best for her, you did all efforts
but everything was shattered in just one glimpse. I wanted to escape from what I really
feel but its my mom, shes a part of me and I don't want to just ignore and do nothing.
You wanted to tell it out loud that your mad and yet you wanted to say you love her so
much. You wanted to hate her for the rest of your life but you also want to forgive her.
You wanted to slap her hard but you also wanna hug her. My mind and my heart are
battling. Hope in the end everything will turn out right..

2008-03-05T23:39:00.000-08:00

There are some people that you cant please in your life. But its sad to know when
someone just get mad at you even if you dont intend to hurt or make them.
Patience should always be unending but there are times you want to fight back
especially when you disagree on their judgment. Oftentimes we get angry and
wanted to get even but still in the end doesnt gives us satisfaction.

For the very first time in my life I received a message from someone who just
cursed me to hell. I know in my life that Im not perfect but I never stepped
on somebody just be ahead of them. I never judged people of how bad they
are coz I know Im not the right person to do such. Never in my entire life intend
to hurt others. This person doesnt really know
me too well. But I asked myself and the one others whom I told about the message,
Am I bad?
Do I deserve such words? All of them says no. But somehow I cant blame them
on doing such. They have their prerogative to tell any words even foul ones. At
first I want to send back a message to them but my mind decided not to. Just
ignore and have a moment with myself. If I could only ask and see God for a
moment I would tell Him how sad I was. I just made a prayer to touch that
person's life. That time will come that person would no longer do it
again, not just to me but to anyone. Give her peace and heart that seizes
understanding and not bitterness.